I was able to post my final grades, including the nice sentiment left by my professor on my portfolio, on the good old Facebook wall, and that pretty much finishes up formalized school for me for a while! it has shown me, yet again, that when I put my mind to something, no matter how tough the road, I don’t give up. Giving up is such a sucker’s bet. After you pour in a lot of time, energy, and sometimes money into something, it seems really lame to just stop. Seriously? Why even start if you are going to chump out at the first sign of difficulty. Even still, I have heard some excuses in my day for why people give up – heck, I work at a school – and it floors me.
“It got too hard.”
“I didn’t think it was going to be like this.”
“I just don’t want it anymore.”
“I am going to go pursue something else.”
While these are sometimes quite valid, in other cases they are not. I have heard people talk about how “into” something they are and then the next minute, they are on to some other cause or project. Those people, I will never get. If you have a true passion for something, it doesn’t just go away. I think that is the real difference between a passion and a whim. For example, fitness and healthy practices; I have a passion to make a change for myself and I have. I am nowhere close to being done with this chapter or journey, but it isn’t going away.
I was talking to a few lady friends of mine about it today and yesterday, and the more I thought about how much I love the gym and practicing my yoga, they aren’t empty words. I do love the “high” I get when I lift weights, and I enjoy the heck out of zoning out while I run. These are not things I do because it is some fad to fill some form of lonely need or another notch in my belt of things I am doing because others are doing it too. I am in it for me. I walk the walk and talk the talk.
I had so many years of being the freaky, goth, jock, poet in high school, and I let life break me away from the athlete within. I am still very much a mesomorph, but not as “together” as I would like to be. I have a passion and a desire to feel that euphoria from being healthy and active. Too many years of sitting around on my duff and having a few health issues can jar you into a real state. I do this to feel like me and enjoy myself in those moments I am striving to go farther than I ever thought I could.
With graduation behind me, I am also doing this in my artistic and professional personas. I have my digital portfolio up, and am completely prepared to make more pieces to add to the categories, I have my new photo site going too, and it is all gravy in the home front. As soon as this whole work transition occurs, I will feel more even there too.
Overall, despite the ups and downs, I am growing, evolving, and filling my life full of my passions – not someone else’s.
Now, I only wish everyone could feel that way!